2014 is Going to be MY YEAR

My year to get healthier
My year to get off of heartburn, cholesterol and high blood pressure pills
My year to shop for new clothes
My year to cross my legs effortlessly
My year to sleep better and wake up refreshed
My year to stop drinking carbonated drinks
My year to buy knee high boots
My year to turn heads
My year to get excited about dressing every morning
My year to buy shorts, size 12 jeans, and medium shirts
My year to make walking a habit
My year to have more sex
My year to love myself again

I joined some WLS groups on FB and have seen a lot of before and after pictures. I've read a lot of comments -- some are laced with frustration, some are non-scale victories (NSV), some are from people that are pre-op, some post-op, some just days out, some many years out...there are men, there are women, near and far, all sharing their experiences on every topic, no holds barred. Some have made me tear up thinking about how I will feel a year from today.

Tomorrow is my next appointment - #2 of 6. I am closer. I am excited. I want to fast forward but take time to absorb everything I can possibly learn and teach myself, habits to break, new habits to make.
I will also meet Dr. Gatmaitan one on one. We will discuss all of the types of surgeries and determine which one is best for me. I am leaning towards a sleeve gastrostomy ("the sleeve")and have a dozen questions to ask.

I still worry I won't be approved. I still worry I will be just as heavy at the end of 2014. I get my hopes up, start daydreaming, envisioning my new self. But I still worry.