Sunday, June 26, 2016

Two Years Post Op

I had my two year appointment with my nutritionist & doctor's PA Margie on Friday!

I was dreading this appointment because I knew I had gained 10 pounds recently.  Well, it was exactly 10 lbs. since my last visit with the office.

Ashton was so compassionate and non-judgmental.  I really appreciate her, but sometimes I feel like she could be a little tougher on me and that would help out a lot.  However, after talking with her, I feel like I am on the right track to rewind the scale and get back on track to my goal weight.

I am still wearing size 10s but really should be back in 12s.  It's crazy how much of a difference 10 lbs gained makes NOW than it did when I was at my highest weight of 250.

I miss feeling super sexy and "at my best" really even though some people have said they didn't notice the weight gain (how sweet)... but they're not the ones looking in the mirror every morning and feeling the extra tightness in work pants I wear twice a week that used to be almost a bit too big.

So the office renewed my script for phentermine (thank god)... I am going to try a full pill daily for 30 days and I really think it'll do the trick.  My first dose was yesterday morning and by 9:15 AM I felt so alert and awake and ready to take on the day!  I also noticed the decreased appetite for sure.

I did pretty well on my protein (about 75g) but I know it needs to be higher and I MUST must watch the quality of food I am eating.  On the way out to a concert last night, we stopped at Wendy's and split a junior bacon cheeseburger and small fries... it "hit the spot" so to speak but I was hungry again in a couple hours.

I just ordered two more big jugs of protein powder, 2 boxes of Muscle Pharm protein bars (those are the SHIT) and have 40 four-packs of Premier Protein shakes on order at Walgreens that I'll be able to purchase at a discount and with coupons for just $2.10 per four pack, or just $.53 each.  They are normally $9.99 ($2.50 each) at Walgreens, so this is a killer deal.

What I'm struggling with is getting exercise in.  I hate that it is so damn hot outside and inside, although there is air conditioning, there are dogs and cats everywhere!  And I don't love the gym.

But I am making excuses, I know.

Thursday, January 28, 2016

Long Time No See

I can't believe it's been 5 months since I've last updated this blog!

After August I really got off track and didn't follow the "rules", so basically I got stuck on purpose and ate mostly what I wanted to, but I stayed in the low- to mid-180s.

After the new year, I knew I had to get to goal in 2016, so I am back on track and concentrating on my protein, water, but especially my exercising -- mostly walking!

As of yesterday, I'm 179.8 lbs. and I was able to wear a size 8 pair of jeans to work (comfortably!) and felt GREAT!

Last weekend I actually purchased a size 6 (GASP!) jeans because I tried them on in a size 10 and LOVED them so much, I couldn't find a size 8 to buy, but they had the 6, so I said "what the hell!" I may as well buy them - you never know!

Well, as I do with most things I buy that don't fit me yet, I have to try it on to feel/see how it fits and what's crazy is that I was able to pull them right on and zip them up!!!!!  Maybe they're mislabeled?  LOL.

Today is going to be a fun day for me -- I am getting some boudoir photographs taken!  I would have NEVER felt comfortable enough to wear skimpy clothes in a photo at 250 lbs!

Mark my words -- I will hit my goal this year of 150-160 lbs.  Yay!

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Update

So it's been a couple months.  I have made it down to 179.2 but then vacation happened and I ate donuts (and then breakfast) every morning.  LOL.... so I put on a few pounds and trying to get it back off, but I haven't weighed daily like I normally do. I think my last weight was 182 this morning.

I'm trying to not be obsessed, but more about the fit of my clothes.  I am getting more and more out of 12s and those size 31 Miss Me jeans I bought like two years ago -- I finally wore them to work last Friday!  I probably should've waited a "few more pounds" lost to wear them, but whatever.

Friday, August 21, 2015

Back in Business?

This says it all:


I think I've broken the plateau but I am not sure!

I have definitely been getting in my vitamins, been pretty good with water...I have been cutting back on multiple coffees per day but I haven't started exercising.

For five days or so I was up and down with 183 (183.2, 183.8, 183.6) and then earlier this week was back to 185 and change, but this morning to my surprise, was a starting number I haven't yet seen (hence the photo)!

Seeing that number makes me want to be better at everything and re-inspires me to stick to it!

As of now I am still wearing some 10s and some 12s. Some 10s are too tight and some 12s look too big - just depends on the designer or type of pants. I am pretty firmly buying mediums in tops, some larger still depending on how I prefer the fit. 

I just realized that I really haven't been sick for a long long time. And if I am too sick to come to work it is because of upset stomach issues because I've overdone it.

I am currently on phentermine again and hoping for a refill. It's amazing how it takes my appetite away and I literally have to remind myself to eat. 

I think that it has really helped me.

Another thing is that I look forward to things more - like a pool party we were invited to earlier this summer...my former, fatter self would have not gone but we went! And I didn't care that people saw me in a bathing suit! Who cares! We are all imperfect in some way and really it's about being with good friends and having fun, not analyzing someone's body! LOL

What a release it has been to just say "fuck it!" and decide to ENJOY myself!  Attitude makes a huge difference!

That's all for now!

Thursday, July 2, 2015

The Plateau of Plateaus

I am about two weeks and two days past my 1 year surgery date of 6/16/2014.  In retrospect, losing weight the first 6-8 months was so, so easy.  If I just stuck to a few rules, I'd lose almost every day.

Today was my one-year follow-up appointment with Dr. G and Ashton.  Boy, have things changed.  First, let me report my weight according to them:  191.4.  So I gained about 5 lbs since April or so.  Yeah, that's about right.

Number 2 change is that Ashton is 8 months pregnant!  I didn't even realize in March that she was pregnant.  She's having a boy and his name is Henry.  :)

Change number 3:  Dr. G is moving back to Pennsylvania and his last day at Baptist is August 14.  That makes me sad.  I liked Dr. G.  He was straightforward, honest, modern.  He said his family's situation never worked out for them to move to FL.  Not sure what all that is about, but he looked pretty sad.  Ashton is pretty sad too.  They haven't found a replacement for him yet, so Dr. Jeffrey Lord is the only game in town and at Sacred Heart.

Well, my appointment went better than I expected.  Dr. G offered phentermine again (I was hoping he would) to control my appetite.  I just EAT, EAT, EAT all the time and I'm not getting my water in and I'm not monitoring my protein like I should be.  Basically I'm not paying attention.

You have to have FOUR things to be a success with weight loss:


  1. PROTEIN
  2. WATER
  3. VITAMINS
  4. EXERCISE
Now I know at least one person that would argue about #4, but I really need to do all four and start up a routine now.  I am not surprised in the least that I put on 5 pounds.  I am actually surprised it wasn't more!  I have been eating all the wrong things -- fried foods, cookies, cake, movie theater popcorn, cocoa krispies, Wendy's, General Tso's chicken, good GOD, you name it.

I let myself have an inch and took a mile, as they say.

So now I have to "get back to basics" -- start having protein shakes again for breakfast, eating more fruits/veggies/greens, focusing back on the "protein first" philosophy, and concentrating on getting my water in.  Boy, can I tell if I haven't had enough water.  It's the stressful (or boring) days at work when I have 2-3 Starbucks coffees and neglect my water because I'm drowning myself in coffee.  Because it tastes good.  Because it makes me happy.  Water is not that happy.  But you know what doesn't make me happy is the headaches I get from being dehydrated.  The weary/tired/weak feeling I get from not having enough protein.

I also skimp on my vitamins.  When I take them, I take them all, but when I skip them, I skip the entire day.  I probably don't take my vitamins on most days, but that is going to change.  I am going to start dividing up my meds again so that taking them at night (and during the day) will be a cinch.

I'm also going to start getting some walks in -- by myself with some music or whatever it takes..... and hell, maybe I'll even start using those wrist and ankle weights I spent $50 on around Christmastime that I have never opened.

I bet that if I do all these things more often than not, I will easily lose the rest of my weight by January 1, 2016.  I want to lose AT LEAST 20 more pounds and then see how I feel then.  Right now, though, I am going to set my first goal to be 5 lbs -- to get to the low 180s (naked) and then into the 170s.  I know I can do this if I just refocus myself and recommit to what I signed up for.

I'm letting myself get away with too much and it has taken a toll on how I feel about myself.  And that is why even when people that haven't seen me for a while see me and comment on my weight loss, I feel completely guilty because I feel like in some way I haven't earned my success because I'm cheating right now -- even though I worked hard leading up to surgery and in the many months afterwards, I was a "good girl" and now I'm not, I feel as if I haven't earned what I've accomplished so far, but really that's not the case and I need to stop thinking that way.

If anyone is out there and actually reads these things, thank you for your support and I hope I have helped inspire SOMEONE, anyone!  I do apologize for going 3 1/2 months since my last post, but honestly, I was feeling pretty crappy about the behaviors I have adapted in recent months that lead my to this "Plateau of Plateaus" when it is really a slow gain LOL.....  Well, I'm starting my phentermine tomorrow and I am going to be SIP, SIP, SIPPING my water all damn weekend and doing the very best I possibly can to get back on track.  Dare I say I may bring my workout bag to work next week?

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Random Thoughts

Why is it still so surprising when a size medium top slides right on and looks right?  Or when size 10 pants make it over my rear?  I never imagined that 12s would ever be too big on me, but they are getting looser and looser week to week.

I just shake my head in disbelief sometimes.  Yes, there were challenges, yes, I still struggle with eating right, but honestly.... the weight came off so easy.  I went from a size 18 and XL tops to size 10 and M what seemed like "overnight"....

But this is my "honeymoon period" -- the first 6 months especially, which are behind me, is when my doctor says I will have lost the most weight.  He stresses that the first year is essentially my best bet at getting to my goal weight.

The REAL challenge will be keeping it off.  What is pretty darn awesome is that I know I will.  I am too scared to go back to where I was.  I can't afford to buy all those clothes again in bigger sizes.  I won't.  My 5-lb window is all I'll give myself and if I gain more than 5 lbs, I'll know I need to re-evaluate my habits, my diet, and my choices I make every day.

Every choice I make contributes to the outcome.  Eating bad for breakfast one morning doesn't mean the whole day is screwed.  It doesn't mean I may as well have a bad lunch and then a bad dinner.  If I make a bad choice for a meal, my next choice can be the RIGHT choice.  I am a sum of my choices, yes....which means to me that having a less-than-nutritionally-smart meal now and then will not screw up my ultimate goal.  If I don't let myself have what constitutes a "treat" in my mind, I will overindulge and regret it and maybe get sick....

Ok.  I am very number-centric.  The number on the scale.  The number on the tag of my jeans.  It's measurable.  My food is measurable.  I should only have 3-4 ounces of meat per serving.  I only get 10g of data per month on my cell phone plan.  I have to be at work at 6:30 am.  Numbers show up in your life and represent something of specific value, specific measure.  They say not to weigh in every day.  I must.  I must because I have to know if I am headed in the right direction.  I need to know I am doing what I'm supposed to be doing.  If I had an open ended start time at work, I would probably struggle every damn morning to get my ass out of bed.  I'd probably say to myself, "Ohhhh, I will just sleep another hour....I can work later today....as long as I get in my 8 hours..."  But I need structure.  I need some kind of expectations every day such as getting my ass to work by 6:30 every morning.  And the fact that I strive for at least 80g of protein daily -- preferably closer to 100g.  That is the expectation, that is the goal that will contribute to my success.

Now if I could just get my ass out walking.  I agreed to walk once a week for the first two weeks...then twice a week the next two weeks after that.  Shouldn't be very hard of a goal, but have I walked yet?  My appointment was a week ago so I should've walked by today.

I'm drinking too much coffee.  Maybe that is why I am typing this blog post at 11:15 PM.  I have to get up in about 6 hours and I'm only a wee-bit tired.  I should probably wrap this up and force myself into bed and close my eyes.  (yawnnnnnnn)

Someone at work says I inspired her to seek out weight loss surgery.  Pretty cool.

Someone who I think is very beautiful and at one time had a body that every woman was envious of recently said to me, "I wish I had your body..."  It took a minute for that to register in my brain.  It's crazy.  Nobody is perfect.  Every woman dislikes SOMETHING about her body.  Every woman wishes she could change herself in some way.  Perfection is overrated.  Even though I will get down to my goal weight of about 150-160 lbs., and maybe I'll have surgery to remove loose skin or get my boobs done, I'm still going to be pale as snow and get zits and have stubby fingers.  That's how God made me.  Besides, I don't have to take high blood pressure meds anymore.  My knees don't ache.  I can run.  I can wear all of my ridiculously high heels.  I can shop in normal stores.  Yeah my hair fell out a bunch and I have weird wisps all over that are impossible to control.  But it's growing back and I'll be back to normal one day.

Having my weight loss surgery was the best decision I could've made for myself.  If I hadn't I would have been yo-yo-ing with my weight the rest of my life.  This new stomach of mine -- this TOOL -- will help me get to a healthy body weight and keep it off the rest of my life so that I can live life to the fullest extent that I desire or imagine.

I don't feel self conscious anymore feeling so fat and uncomfortable in every piece of clothing I own.  It is kind of NICE to look forward to getting dressed every day.  To getting the reactions from folks I haven't seen in a while.  I am not prideful, but I am proud of my progress.  I am more confident.  I have a better self image and an improved outlook on my health.

I have been hovering at 185.2 lbs. for the last 3-5 days or so.  I swear the scale remembers me and just spits back out whatever the last reading was.  So as of this morning, my total lost is 64.8 pounds from my highest weight in April 2014 of 250.0 lbs.  Crazy.  The most I ever lost on my own was about 25 lbs.  I don't remember every buying size 10 jeans.  The only garment I remember was my white graduation dress when I was 18 -- it was a size 12.  Kind of wish I had kept it!  Shit, kind of wish I had kept my fat jeans, but those went to consignment.  I don't need a reminder of where I've been.  It's all up in here (pointing to my head)...plus there's tons of pictures in cyberspace and my mom's scrapbooks.  LOL

I will never forget where I came from.
And I am so very thankful for where I am now and where I am headed.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Phentermine Follow-Up & First Bariatric Panel Results

I am so surprised to tell you this, but I lost almost 10 pounds since my last visit to Dr. G on 2/12!

Needless to say, my doc and my dietician were pretty pleased with my progress.  SO that means that my script got renewed!  Yay!  I really feel a difference in my energy and appetite on this drug.

It's weird, but I actually feel more focused and mentally alert at work than I have before, and my hunger/appetite has definitely been suppressed.

The only downside is that I have had some issues with insomnia.  I have some Super Snooze with Melatonin coming from www.puritan.com along with some chai tea bags to try and some probiotics.

At the support group this past Tuesday night, Dr. G talked about a conference he recently attended where a speaker talked about a study at Stanford.  The study took fecal matter from lean folks and some from not-lean folks and studied the bacteria in each.  Apparently the lean poop had a different composition of bacteria than the "fat" poop and when the lean poop was transplanted into a "fat" rat or some animal I forget, the animal lost weight at a higher rate.  Who knew they did fecal transplants, but apparently they are common for humans with C-Dif.  Google that!

Anyways, the convo went to probiotics and how there was a study group of users and a group of folks that got placebos and those that were on probiotics lost a higher percentage of weight than those that took the placebos.  Soooooo I ordered some on puritan.com last night as well.  Won't hurt!

At today's appointment I also got back the results of my first bariatric panel (blood work).  My vitamin D was 27 and normal range is 30-100.  Soooo now I have to take an additional supplement and be retested 6 months.  Get rid of high blood pressure pill, add in a Vit D supplement.  I hate taking pills on a schedule but that's what I signed up for when I got surgery.

Pics below are of my weight chart from the bariatric clinic -- showing my progress!  I know it's weird, but it is something I wanted to document:  my legs.  I had to dress up at work today and wore a dress I purchased probably a year ago -- size 10.  It just barely fit and honestly I think 10 more pounds and it'd be perfect; however, like I said, I had to dress up, so that was the best I could do.  And I thought my legs looked the skinniest I can ever remember, so I had to take a picture.  That is all!





Saturday, March 7, 2015

Phentermine & 63 lbs. Lost

So a couple days after my last post, I emailed my nutritionist asking for help.  My appetite has been out of control!  So they prescribed me phentermine, which is an FDA approved drug mainly used as an appetite suppressant.

I started it on Friday morning, the 13th.  I have to take it 1-2 hours before breakfast, so I take it as soon as I get up.

So far I've been on it for over three weeks.  It definitely works as promised!  One of the side effects is insomnia and on three recent nights, I experienced that.

I am down since I started the drug, but I am not sure how much.  My follow up appointment is next week.  Hopefully my doc will give me some refills, but I have to show a loss for him to approve that.  In addition, I will get the results of my first bariatric blood panel where I will find out whether all my vitamins are at the right levels.

This week I also saw my regular GP, Dr. Nichols.  I had regular labs done this week to find out if my cholesterol is improving.  The good news is that it has improved since my last visit in December; however, he wants me to continue on the Lipitor and see me back in 6 months.

Some additional good news is that I am off high blood pressure meds for good.  Yay!

My last weight was 187, which is 63 lbs lost from my HIGHEST weight of 250 in April 2014.  I have gone from a size 18/XL to a 10/12 and medium tops.  I am sort of in the middle of a 10 and a 12 because I have some size 10 jeans and work pants that fit me just fine but not all size 10s fit me like all size 12s do...

That is all for now!


Sunday, February 8, 2015

Shit got real

Ok, I have to write in good times and in bad.

Most weigh-ins were in the 180s, then in the last two weeks I have been in the 190s, and most recently 192 and change.  So guess what -- when I lost weight years ago, it creeped creeped creeped back on -- teeny tiny bit at a time -- until I had no idea what happened.

I'm not letting that happen again.  So I'm trying like hell to "get back to basics" -- walking, getting my protein in, getting my water in.  Friday and Saturday I didn't have any coffee.  Today I made a coffee but drank 2/3 of it.  It just didn't taste as good as I remember.  Which is weird.  But good.

So I am struggling to make more healthier choices than not, to drink more water than anything else, and to get moving more.

If all goes well this week, I would expect to be back in the 180s by next weekend.  For good!

One thing I've learned through this is that even WITH weight loss surgery, you're still going to struggle, you STILL have to make good choices and that six month "supervised" by nutritionist period before surgery to instill better habits is really really important.  During that 6 months sometime, I got into the habit of NOT drinking soda, and of not drinking during meals.  For the most part, I have stuck to that habit 99%.  I occasionally have a sip of soda and occasionally have a glass of wine with a meal, but 9.9 times out of 10, I don't.  It's not normal for me anymore.

The habits I need to instill a bit better -- as they were the first 4-6 weeks out of surgery -- is limiting my sweets to something maybe once a week -- instead of something little every day.

It's simple, people.  Calories in vs. calories out.  That's how to lose weight.  And by the way, if when you're losing weight you don't want your body to eat at your muscle, GET YOUR PROTEIN IN -- 80 to 100 grams per day.  MINIMUM.

So I am watching my calories again -- logging into my fitness pal daily to keep myself accountable and to get back on track to losing.  I promise myself I will be wearing shorts (proudly) this summer.
I think it is about time I do, living in Florida for 10+ years.  (shaking my head)

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Tens...?

Yep.  Got these Old Navy sweetheart style size 10s off off ThredUp and tried them on for kicks...and to have something to compare to...

They fit. Totally. Like...totally. 

 
I'm in awe. 


Sunday, December 21, 2014

Holy Shit: The 180s


I am in awe.  I finally hit the 60 lb mark -- 60.4 to be exact and I couldn't be more elated!  Of course I have to be specific and say that I have lost 60 lbs. from my highest weight of 250 in April 2014. If we're just talking surgery date, then it is 45.6 lbs....still not too shabby and I am happy with that!


My primary care physician informed me that my blood pressure is too low -- it was 100/something so he slashed my BP meds in half for three months and is going to re-evaluate me then.  My cholesterol skyrocketed, so I am stuck on my statin for now.  He was pretty happy with my weight loss though.

My 6 month post of appointment with Dr. Gatmaitan was this past Wednesday, 17 December.  I will say that in all of my appointments with him, my nurse Jenn, and my dietician Ashton, I have not lied one bit.  I always come clean with my diet/exercise/protein/water questions -- and this was no exception.  I admitted to drinking more coffee than water, not exercising much at all, signing up for aquaerobics and not going, maybe getting in 50g of protein a day.... and of course they encouraged me to turn all of that around, and I plan to!

My weight loss in the last two months has been VERY slow -- only about 7-8 lbs total and before I was losing about 10 lbs each month, so I am behind in my opinion.  They wanted me to be at 50% loss of excess weight at 6 months but I only hit 44.8%.  Check out my chart...


Despite not being where THEY want me to be, I gotta say I am pretty darned happy with where I am.  Not that I don't want to lose more -- I do -- but the slow loss has helped me save money because I've been in my 12s for a while LOL.  I do have a couple 10s lined up to "try on" for fun, but I'm no where near the next size down, so I'm enjoying things.

So my next "mini-goal" is of course to get to the 170s....and my "GOAL GOAL" is probably going to be 157.  I know it's an odd number, but first, I like the sound of the 150s and second, while maintaining my goal weight, if I hit 160 at any time, I know I need to re-focus and watch myself more closely.

Here's what I'm going to do to help myself get there:


  1. First, I am going to try the Couch to 5K app again.  A while back I was on a walk with Samson and decided to jog and it came easier than I expected, so I think it is time to start running (jogging, really)...the first time I tried it I was a lot heavier and made it to 3 workouts before quitting.
  2. AND I'm going to limit myself to one coffee a day for now -- and only after I've had at least half of my daily fluid intake (32 oz) first.
  3. I am going to re-focus on getting 90-100g of protein each day, so this means having a protein shake and possibly a protein bar daily.

 I can't wait to report back on how I'm doing with these goals!


Saturday, December 6, 2014

Coming up on 6 months & PCP Visit

I am still so surprised that I'm shopping for mediums and size 12s.  Size 12s, I have found, seem to be a pretty popular size.  On more than a few occasions, I have found a pair of pants or jeans that I absolutely ADORED and all the 12s were gone already.  Kind of funny to me.

Today I went to Kohl's to spend my Kohl's Cash and bring a return in.  That place was HOPPING crazy.  I think everyone else was spending their KC.  Anywhooooo I wandered around and found three scarves (can't grow out of those in either direction!) and a pair of size 10 jeans on clearance.

When I picked them up, I was thinking it would be nice to have a couple of size 10s ready to go once my 12s get too big.  I decided to try them on just to see how they fit now and I was able to get them on and button/zip....but they were super tight and not presentable to public.  LOL  I think they may have been on clearance because they were marked on the tag size 10 SHORT, but they were NOT short.  I had to roll them up a few inches to avoid tripping.  Anywho, they were practically free after my $40 KC plus 20% off.

My 6-month anniversary is coming up on December 16th -- my appointment is the 17th but I don't think I'm going to make their "goal" of 50% excess weight loss by then.  I think by my calculations it would be a weight of about 183 and I'm about 10 lbs. short of that.  I'm not that worried about it, actually.

One more thing about my Kohl's trip -- I found this off white v-neck sweater that had pink crystals all over the front -- so cute.  The only had one left on the model -- size small.  I held it up and it looked like it would fit me.  It did.  A small.  A SMALL fit me!  But I didn't buy it because it had a snag on the front.  Made me happy, though!

I had some labwork done last week and my 6-month primary care physician follow up Thursday. This was THE appointment I was hoping he'd tell me I will be off my high BP and high cholesterol medications.  My blood pressure was low -- 107/70 or something.  He said that is normal because BP generally lowers with weight loss; however, it was TOO low, so he is reducing my dosage and hopefully I will be off of it in 3 months...he didn't want to take me off cold turkey.

The cholesterol was the complete opposite -- it had gone from the high 80s/low 90s to over 140, so I am to remain on my cholesterol meds and will be rechecked in 3 months.  I admitted to him that I had been slacking pretty good on my meds so he wanted me to be more consistent with taking them daily.

That is all for now!  Happy holidays!

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Current weight: 193.2 - Total Lost: 56.8

I just passed my 5 month mark two days ago.  I have about four weeks to lose another 10 lbs for my doctor to be happy with my progress.  Hope I can do that!

I won the Small Group Training raffle that was held during United Way, which is pretty cool since it was worth about $150.  I decided to delay participating until early next year because I'm just not in the mood and I think the "new year" feel will motivate me to go to all of the classes.  Going during the holidays -- not so much.

The boots I mentioned in my last post did not fit well enough.  They went back, along with many other items I purchased in the last month or so.

I got a bag full of new work pants/jeans/tops for free at the consignment store I frequent.  I had credit from selling my bigger clothes, so that was nice.

I am eating a protein bar daily but concentrating less on getting a certain number of grams every day.

I am drinking coffee daily (sometimes twice) now and have learned to make a very close match to Starbucks' White Chocolate Mocha (I purchased the same brand of chocolate they use in-store), which will save me money but is not helpful to my weight loss efforts.  I find myself getting a coffee instead of a meal -- justifying it by saying to myself that there is milk in it.

Exercise is non-existent.  I know, I know.  Water intake is decent, though.  Which for me is more important with my coffee habit.

I should probably take measurements again soon.

That's all for now!

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Clothes Whore

That's what I'm becoming.  I am buying stuff like crazy because I'm in a new range of weight that is putting me in a bunch of size 12 pants and medium tops!

I know my husband is trying not to say anything.  Hell, he's not paying for any of my clothes, but the closet is getting fuller by the week.

I'm ready for another trip to the consignment shop with my size 14 dress pants and several tops that I purchased there a couple months ago.

One clothing item I went nuts on is new bras.  I'll tell ya, it's not a good look to wear a bra that doesn't fit.  I went from a 42C to a 38B.  While shopping for new bras (in the beginning), I was told by a Soma Intimates clerk that my right boob is bigger than my left boob.  Apparently this is quite common.  Has it been that way all my life?  Why haven't I noticed this before?  I was dumbfounded.  What a difference it made to wear the bra that fit my new body!  Yay for bras!

My wedding rings are also super loose.  I told my husband that I'll get them sized once they start flinging off my finger, but maybe that's a bad idea.  I don't want to be like my brother and fling a very expensive Tacori band into the Atlantic while hurling a football.  Lesson learned -- I will get them sized soon.

I also decided to purchase a brown and a black pair of tall leather boots.  My calves are still larger than normal women's calves, so I had to get the "wide calf" version.  I sure hope they fit nice!

My hair is falling out like crazy.  It really sucks, actually.  So much so, that I'm trying to train my hair to be washed less often because when I wash my hair, it comes out.  I don't even blow dry my hair straight anymore because I don't want to put more stress on my tresses.  Luckily I am blessed with tons of hair already, but my hairdresser even noticed it had thinned out a lot since she saw me last.

My nutritionist says that it is due to the stress on my body of losing weight fast and that there is nothing I can do about it and that it should subside/stop after my weight loss slows after December (6 months).  I sure hope so, otherwise, I'll be shopping for wigs or Rogaine or something.

I still can't believe I'm under 200 pounds.  I really was hoping I'd made it under 200 by the end of the year.  Now I'm setting a goal of getting to 175 by 2015.  Looking forward to the challenge of the holidays!

My last thought:  it is so very nice to not dread getting dressed for work every day.  And I may just have to buy my first pair of shorts in Florida for next summer.


Friday, October 10, 2014

ONEDERLAND!

Two days ago I finally got to visit ONEderland, which is when one gets into the 100s on the scale!  As of this morning, I am officially at 198.2 with a total loss of 51.8 lbs.

I have to say I am pretty damn happy about it.

April 14, 2014 was a very sad day for me -- I weighed my highest EVER:  250.0 lbs.  I am never going back to the 200s.  NEVER.

My nurse, nutritionist, and doctor were VERY pleased with my progress thus far.  My nurse, Jennifer, said that she expects to see me lose 50% of my excess weight at the 6 month mark, which would mean I have to lose an additional 14 lbs. by December 17th.

Here is a picture of my updated chart, which chronicles every weigh in since I started my 6 months of supervised nutritionist visits in December, 2013.


Something I just noticed on this chart the reference to "IBW" -- Ideal Body Weight....and that it says 131 next to that....Ummmm.... I don't plan on being a STICK.  That weight seems WAY too low for me.  When I graduated high school I was about 155 and my graduation dress was a size 12.  Since I'm in a size 12 jean/pant right now, it seems ludicrous that if I lost another 50 lbs that I would still be a size 12.... did I forget what size I wore at age 18?  I am not as clear as to what my jean size was then, but I do remember my graduation dress size.  I know I'm thinking too hard about it, so I guess I will just have to wait and see what size I will end up as.  

Getting below 200 is so exciting for me since I haven't been under 200 since the 90s.  And I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the attention.  I feel so good about my body and how my clothes fit - there is no way I won't be wearing shorts next summer and that's a huge bonus in Florida!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Current Weight: 201.6 - Total Lost: 48.4 lbs.

Just got back from Ireland a few days ago.  Did some MAJOR walking -- I averaged about 9,000 steps every day.  But I was on vacation and ate some things I shouldn't have (in moderation), had more alcohol than I would ever have at home -- one night I had 5 rounds over the course of 4 hours or so....and didn't feel so great the entire next day.  But I had so much fun!

I weighed in the morning after I returned and was a bit disappointed at gaining about a pound and a half to two pounds....however, as of this morning, the extra weight has dropped off and I'm at my lowest weight so far, so I thought it was worth a blog post.

Today I wore my favorite grey dress pants to work.  They are way too big now... and they're a size 14.  Soooooo I decided to go to Kohl's after work today and just try on some size 12s.

I must've grabbed about 12 pairs from different brands and a pair of jeans to boot.  I got them ALL on.  This made my day for sure!


Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Current Weight: 202.8 - Total Lost: 47.2 lbs.

Last night I went for a walk with Samson.  Just to see what he would do, I started jogging.  He kept looking at me like he was saying, "Mommy, what is THIS?" except he kept crossing a bit in front of me where I kept stepping on his toes.  I don't know how long we were jogging together, but you know what I do know?  It was a helluva lot easier to jog than it was when I attempted the Couch 2 5K program a while ago.  Surely this means I may be a little more in shape than I was -- or perhaps losing close to 50 lbs has really made a difference in the lightness of my step... either way, I feel like something has changed for the better.  And that makes me happy.

I decided to put together some before and after pictures at this point.  The before pictures were taken in January and the new pictures were taken today (except for the face pic which was on Labor Day).



Three more pounds and here I come, ONEderland!  And this is for next summer:




Sunday, September 14, 2014

Current Weight: 203.8 - Total Lost: 46.2 lbs.

Scale finally moved after two weeks.  Not by much, but I'm not complaining!

Starting to get really excited about going to Ireland next week.  Only 8 days away!  Speaking of countdowns (or countups), today marks 90 days since my gastric sleeve surgery.

We'll be doing a LOT of walking around Dublin city center, and on several day trips we're planning, so I am looking forward to coming back to some weight loss!

Got some great used clothes in the mail last week - and brought a TON of clothes to the consignment shop this weekend, too.  My closet gets happier and happier.

I think I'm going to be in between sizes for a while -- as in, in between a 12 and 14.  Some of my 14s are getting baggy in the bum, but I can't squeeze into 12s (no where near).


Saturday, September 6, 2014

Current Weight: 204.2 - Total Lost: 45.8 lbs.

Gah!  I'm so close to the 100s and have been hovering between 204.2 and 205 for over a week now.  I know why though.  I have been eating stuff I used to eat -- boneless honey bbq chicken wings with ranch dressing, a few french fries one day, even drinking white chocolate mochas from starbucks.

So I really need to take a step backwards and refocus on my main goals each day: 80-100g of protein and 64+ oz of fluids.

In the mean time, my go-to jeans and work pants are starting to get a teeny bit baggy.  My new favorite jeans are a pair of size 15 sweetheart Old Navy boot cut in a dark wash.  They make me feel so good, but after most of the day has passed, they stretch a bit and then I'm pulling them up after I get up (I need to wear a belt from now on).

This is a good problem to have, I know, but it kind of stinks to be in between sizes because 12s will certainly be too tight on me and some 14s will soon be just a bit too baggy to look right.

Luckily, I do have a pair of size 12 jeans and a couple of 14s that still don't fit me yet.  I also put in a big order to www.thredup.com -- an online thrift store -- and have 9 new tops (mainly for work) coming.  I can't wait to get that box!  I have an awesome BCBGMAXAZRIA cardigan -- retail was $198 but I paid just under $40:


I also got another cardigan -- from Dress Barn I think, for $4.99 on ThredUp.  I LOVE the detail at the shoulders and it is a great neutral color.  LOVE LOVE LOVE


One of the other pieces I got was from a company I had never heard of - C & C California, known for their casual clothing -- I absolutely LOVE the color and style of this top and picture wearing it with some black leggings.  Retail $88, paid $20.49:


And here's a Banana Republic cardigan that retails for $60 I got for $15.99.  It has ribbing which is so much more interesting than plain!


So, I did some shopping.  Packing for Ireland should be pretty easy.  Packing for trips -- even short weekend ones to Virginia were so depressing.  I usually had just one pair of jeans that I wore over and over and I hated all of my clothes.  Now I have so many things to pick from that are cute and FIT great and I feel so much better in my skin now -- that sure makes a huge difference!

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Current Weight: 209.2 + Measurements #3 - 21.5" GONE!

Decided to do my measurements today since I am at my 2 month post op mark.  

Neck 14.75" (-.75")
Arms 16" (-2.0")
Breast 40.5" (-5.0")
Waist/Stomach 38" (-4.25")
Hips/Butt 46.5" (-4.5")
Thigh 28" (-3.0")
Calf 18" (-2.0")


I am pretty happy about my waist going into the 30s -- puts me closer to my size 31 (about a size 12) Miss Me jeans that are sitting in my closet (aren't they HOT?).



The most loss has been around my breasts.  OF COURSE!  Weight loss always hits the places you don't want to lose, doesn't it?  But I'm not complaining because that does mean less back fat, doesn't it?  :)

My weight this morning made me do a double take -- 209.2!  That puts me at 40.8 lbs. lost from my highest weight of 250 in April 2014.  I am pretty happy about being so much closer to the 100s.

Chugging along!  

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Current weight: 210.4. Total weight loss: 39.6 lbs.

So close to FORTY pounds lost!

Since the scale finally moved, I decided to try on a pair of gray work pants I've had for a while, but haven't fit me in years and years.  I tried them on a couple weeks ago and they were just too tight but today, they slid right on and fit perfectly.

It's times like these, that all of this hard work makes it worth it.  The good eating, the workouts, the water...

I've been trying to up my protein intake to 80-100 grams per day and it hasn't been easy.  Today I had 75g, yesterday 96g, Monday 66g, Sunday 76g...I'm all over the place.  To help get me there, I bought some protein bars -- Quest, Luna, another brand...they all taste pretty good, but it was the Quest bar that was the most filling and satisfying.  And it has 20g of protein in one bar!

The training class on Tues/Thur is going well.  I definitely feel challenged each time.  I really have to push myself to make it to the 60 minute mark, though!  And I need new workout shoes that give me more support/structure since I'm bouncing around so much.

Someone I used to work with passed me in the hallway this morning and I smiled at him and continued on my way.  He had turned around at some point and came to find me in the cafeteria and said, "Oh my gosh, I didn't recognize you!  You're the incredible shrinking woman!"  That made my day and I felt great today anyway, so I guess it showed.

Looking forward to whatever's coming my way...

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Current weight: 212.0. Total weight loss: 38 lbs.

Yesterday was my 7-week Doctor follow up appointment.  I have lost 23% of my excess weight, which they said was great for the 7 week mark.  At 3 months I should be at 30%, and Nurse Jenn seems to think I will be ahead of the game for that milestone.

My nutritionist says I should be eating more fiber, so I am now going to work in a supplement or something to help with that.  


Doctor G says if I want to break my stall (although, I went down slightly on the scale this morning), I should bump up my protein intake to 80-100 grams!  I have been consistently getting about 65-70.


In a couple weeks I'm going back to do a Basal Metabolic Rate test which is an estimate of how many calories you'd burn if you were to do nothing but rest for 24 hours. It represents the minimum amount of energy needed to keep your body functioning, including breathing and keeping your heart beating.  Whatever that number is, apparently you're supposed to eat 500 calories LESS to lose weight.  Ashton says mine is probably 1400-1600 -- a calculator online says it is about 1663 based on my current weight, height, and age.  But I want real numbers.  The test takes 10 minutes and costs $50.  Should be worth it, I feel.


I recently signed up for a small group training class at work.  It is on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 5 PM to 6 PM.  It involves Bosu balls, exercise balls, treadmills, and circuit machines.  Tonight I hear we'll be doing jumping jacks while holding two heavy ropes between a partner.  Sounds interesting and difficult.  I am so sore from this past Tuesday's workout, but I will go and I will do my best to keep up, but I'm not promising anything!  LOL


I've been taking Samson on walks sort of regularly, so that is the only other exercising I'm doing.  Next month I was thinking about redeeming a Groupon I purchased for a one-month membership at a local indoor pool that has classes and aqua Zumba.  My friend goes and seems to love it.  I have been there before with another friend but honestly the workouts were kinda boring.  These should be more interesting, I would think!


That's all for now -- hoping to do my measurements this weekend to see how they've changed.

Monday, July 28, 2014

Current Weight: 212.8; Loss: -37.2 lbs.

People are starting to notice.  Which is kind of cool.  Especially coming from those that didn't know I had surgery.

I am still hungry more often than I was before.  And I can eat more than I used to eat in one sitting.  If the protein is more dense (chicken),  I fill up faster than less dense (yogurt).  But I'm sticking to good, nutritious foods for the most part.

Tonight I branched out a bit -- I had a small slice of Sam's frozen pizza -- it was a thin crust bacon chicken ranch pizza and it was DIVINE.  I think I do OK with thin crust, but pizza will be a once or twice a month kind of meal.

I'm eating a yogurt once a day and at least one protein shake a day.  I am getting over 60g of protein every day easily now.  Getting closer to 80g a day is more of a challenge, but basically means having an extra protein shake....which is a lot easier to get down than it used to be.

Just taking it one day at a time and enjoying feeling comfortable in clothes again.


Thursday, July 24, 2014

214.6 - Down 35.4 but Hungry!

Thirty-eight days post op and a few days ago I started to get hungry more often than every 4 hours and today I was able to finish a whole container (5.3 oz) of yogurt.  It is possible that I am actually feeling thirst as opposed to hunger, so I will have to remember to drink drink drink before I eat anything to make sure.

Now that my appetite is back, I seem to be losing focus on what I am supposed to be eating (and not eating).  Today I had a bite of one of the cake pops I made.  It was delicious.  I gave the rest to my friend.  Luckily, it didn't upset my stomach and I really truly savored that bite.  It was a treat!  But it is too early to be eating those types of things, probably...

This week Rich helped me make a breakfast quiche with bacon, cheese, and onion.  It was pretty tasty.  I want to try another version with egg, cheese, and ham next.

The scale isn't really budging lately...been a few days since I saw a drop on the scale.  I am hoping to see something change in the morning.  Inching closer to the 210s!!


Sunday, July 20, 2014

Current Weight: 215.4; Loss: -34.6

I think it'll be way more exciting to watch my post titles as time goes on -- so I think I will just use my current weight as the title.  Aaaaaand that way I don't have to think super hard about it.  :)

This weekend we went to Hard Rock for two nights.  Eating was somewhat of a challenge and I took a few risks that I probably shouldn't have.  Luckily I didn't have any negative side effects from anything.

My favorite meal by far was the hickory bbq pulled pork at the Hard Rock Cafe.  YUM!

Today I decided to "get back on track" with my eating and did pretty well today with my protein (55 grams) -- shooting for 80, but that is damn good.

I just got my box of Isopure 8 oz protein drinks -- one is punch and one is grape.  The taste is very good at first and then there is this very strange aftertaste that sometimes makes me gag.  But for $50 (for 4 six-packs), I'm planning to drink them ALL.  Each 8 oz drink has 15 grams of protein!

For lunch today I ate turkey pepperoni and Babybel mozzarella cheese melted in the microwave.  Sooo good!  This meal weighed 2 oz and I ate all but one of the bites.


I took a full-length selfie in our hotel room because I will appreciate the butt shots one day.  I have definitely lost a bunch of inches around my waist because I could pull these jeans down while they were zipped and buttoned!!  They ended up being very annoying to wear walking around because I was constantly pulling them up.

Now that I am doing well with my protein and fluids, my next two life habits I MUST get used to more are taking my vitamins regularly and exercising at least 3 times a week.  I signed up for the President's Challenge at work and committed to working out 3 times a week, so I plan on sticking to it.  My bicycle has been outfitted with a new cruiser seat so my butt won't hurt riding for a while.  Rich also put some flashing lights on the front and back for me, AND I just got a cell phone holder that clips on to the handlebar so that I can mount my phone and track my rides via Map My Ride app.

Tomorrow will be my 5-week mark!  Looking forward to a week of nutritional food, good bike rides, and a bit of weight loss, too!