Support Group

Rich and I attended support group tonight.  There was no special guest -- it was the nutritionist Ashton and nurse Jennifer and Dr. G (nice surprise!).

Other than Lori, there were no familiar faces from last month, including the new friend I made last month that had the sleeve - Leticia.

One new thing I learned was that those who have an issue with depression pre-surgery will have a greater likelihood of having increased depression symptom post-surgery.  One of the reasons is that the patient still sees their old (fat) self even after they've lost the weight.

I have never had a problem with depression.  Sure, I've been depressed about my weight from time to time, I've been depressed because I haven't seen my family in a while and am sad.  I may wake up in a bad mood and seem depressed all day.  But being depressed (at least to me) is different from "having depression" -- at least in the clinical sense that one is diagnosed.

See, I can't even IMAGINE that I would see my old fat self after losing weight.  Sure, I may think, "oh, I hope I can lose 15 more pounds - that would be great!".  

But I have lost weight before and I distinctly remember feeling AMAZING, CONFIDENT, SEXY, loving the attention.  It was mentioned by the doctor tonight that some people can't handle the new attention or the way people now look at them after they've lost weight.  

I sincerely hope that I am not like that.  After years and years of feeling overlooked by others because of my weight -- strangers and non-strangers alike, I would welcome the compliments.

HOWEVER.

I know I am going to be one of those people that will be very annoyed, disappointed, and/or angry because of the attention/comments/compliments/acknowledgement/etc. that I receive once I'm at a healthy weight that DIDN'T give me the time of day when I was heavier.  

So if you're going to be one of those people that says hello (and you never did before) or ask me to hang out or go for drinks (when you didn't before), or if you're going to be jealous of my success or my smaller-size-than-you jeans I rock out, please just keep it to yourself and ignore me like you did before.  My weight doesn't define me, my character does, among other important traits.  And honestly if you are one that treats ANYONE differently based on their weight (or sexual orientation, or race, or gender, or nationality, etc etc etc), then you are probably not someone I want to have in my life anyway.  :)

Ok, that is all.